“Mashed Potatoes and Gravy Waterfalls” by Stephanie W.

Editor's Note: Stephanie wrote this essay for a psychology class. The assignment was to describe schizophrenia. Stephanie decided to write it from a first person perspective. She does not mean to offend anyone, and apologizes if anyone takes offense at the humorous tone one personality takes.

mashed potatoes are my friends. sees here, this is smilie. and this one here is geoorgeeee. for fun we like to frolic in fields of lima beans. people say i'm a weirdo, but they don't understand the gravy waterfalls.

i remember my first ear of corn. it was all dark and shiny. mommy said it was indian corn, but all i know is it was love. we met in arizona, the fields there are huge and swimmy. it was buy one get one free!

what's that geoorgeeee? NO! i don't wanna! NO, that liking is not a th-somethin-or-others. they make me hurt inside my pumpkin. No, No, No! Ahhhhhhhhhhh!

I'm not a schizophrenic. I swear I don't know what you're talking about. Dr. Green said that at least 90% of Manic-depressive patients recover. I said I'm not schizophrenic. He chuckled and showed me out.

don't even think about munchin' smilie! he's my friends. have i told you i l-o-o-o-o-v-v-v-e-e you? Mumph! Yuck, you gots butter on my chin. don't TOUCH him, he's mine! MINE, MINE, MINE!

derlusions, heh heh heh, thas funny. heh heh heh. this man say i be fre-e-e-a-k-y-e-e. sigh, heh heh heh. I'm a schizoid, ya knowd that. i like dat word. he he he. i's eccentric to others, too, also, waz that. OUCH! he he he, that waz funny. do it again. i luv thoose sprinkling blue lights.

Somehow I was at the doctor's again. I try to tell them I'm not insane. Still he insists that I'm in denial. He says that I'm a hebephrenic schizophrenic, or very disorganized. He just doesn't see my normality.

did ya knew the win waz blue? ep! it is. it blue with pinkie dotties. pinkie dotties, i love pinkie dotties. i sees pinkie dotties under my skin. FANTASIES. i love FANTASIES. i think i sing my fantasy song.

La La La Fantasy oh fantasy La La La oh my tiny fantasy La La La OH-I-LOVE-YOU-FANTASY! AHHHHHHHHH!

that waz good. should... can we sing... no? YOU did not like my SONG! i scoop you up and eat you smilie! Chomp Chomp Chomp! MMMMMM. that was a tasty friends.

I don't have hallucinations. Dr. Green said it was a part of my condition. What ever that is supposed to mean. He said I was seen singing! I don't sing. He said it was part of psychosis- not knowing fantasy from reality.

i miss smilie, geoorgeee. wha ever happen' to him? no, you get out the front door! why... how would I do that? he runned away thas it. thas all. he runned.

mommy was a potato. she was lumpy and queer. heh heh heh, queer. i get gigglies when i's thinks on her. she was a sweet tater, a sweet tater, a bubuolimum. he he he. i don't know.


Dr. Green said I have to take some medicine, thioxanthens?, that blocks the action of dopamine. It tastes awful. I try and try to make them understand but he will not listen.

la la la la neolololologisms. make up wordies. buzelparp. he he. dobledump. twizzlefink stink. wert. polkas love to tupoa. oh well, don't we all.

AHHHHHH it moved! i seen it. I's seen it! i's swear the couch ate my corn. the flower blooms at kaufmans underwear sale. fishy, fishy, come to mishy. that rhymes. he he he.

I try to tell them I'm not a nutcase, but they just don't understand the gravy waterfalls. Some of my best friends are mashed potatoes.